Attack of the 'Butcher'
by FairyLyte
Summary: Word of advice. Never speak his name on a dark, stormy night. For in one night, it turned from a meeting, into a nightmare. Co-written with Durbe The Barian.


**Disclaimer: I don't own Zexal.**

* * *

_Attack of the 'Butcher'_

_Word of advice. Never speak his name on a dark, stormy night. For in one night, it turned from a meeting... to a nightmare._

_Mystery/Humor_

* * *

It was supposed to be a simple meeting. Just a meeting on the human world, in the BARian. And this meeting was going particularly well, seeing as how Durbe was able to keep Vector from doing anything stupid, Misael from killing Vector, and Alit and Gilag from horsing around. It was, in his opinion, the best meeting they ever had.

Right until the storm hit, knocking out all the power.

So there they were, in the dark, in a storm, with the thunder and lightning so bad none of the Emperors wanted to risk leaving. Oh, and let's not forget screaming Barians.

"AHHHHHH!" Alit was screaming, running around the darkened BARian. "We're gonna die!"

"Don't be stupid, Alit," Misael said. "There's no way a little lightning will kill us!" Alit stopped running immediately. At first Misael thought he'd made his point clear to him.

Boy, was he wrong.

Alit then ran over to Misael, grabbed his shoulders, and started to shake him furiously. "What do you mean by saying it's stupid?! It makes perfect sense! It's dark, it's cold, and we're in danger of lightning hitting us at any moment! If that doesn't make sense, I don't know what will!"

"Alit, it's okay!" Gilag said. "I don't think we'll get hit."

"I agree," Vector said. "We can just tie Miza-chan on the roof, and the lightning will hit him! He is the tallest, not to mention most pretty. I think it will work."

"Why you little-" Misael broke from Alit's grip and began looking around the room. "I'd kill you if I could see you!"

"Yeah," Alit agreed. "What does beauty have to do with it anyway?"

Vector walked towards Alit, following his voice, and whispered in his ear, "Absolutely nothing!"

"All right, stop it, all of you." Durbe had lit the emergency candles and all the oil lamps. He carried a lit candle with him, it's yellow light gently flickering. He also held four more unlit ones in his other hand. "Here, each of you take one. And no playing with any of them." Durbe gave a glance at Vector when he said that.

Misael had contemplated setting Vector's clothes on fire, but Durbe's words just put a lot of white-out on **that** option.

Durbe opened the door to the living quarters of the BARian, revealing a short hallway, with three doors to the right and a sliding-door closet to the left. Durbe walked over to the closet, opened it up, and pulled out five sleeping bags and a couple of blankets. He turned to the door, and, opening it, beckoned the other Emperors in.

The Emperors entered, grabbing a sleeping bag as they went in. It was a wide room, also a very empty room. This part of the BARian was probably only used for emergencies, like the one they were in right now. There were a few shelves built into the walls, but that was it. No windows. No nothing.

After everyone got in, Durbe closed the door. Then he and Misael spread out the two blankets on the floor, where the rest of the Emperors unrolled their sleeping bags. Durbe gathered the candles from them all and began placing them on small stands he found in the closet. Then he unrolled his sleeping bag, got into it, and tried to go to sleep.

Emphasis on 'tried'.

Every time the thunder sounded in the sky, Alit would whimper and curl in his sleeping bag a bit more. Very hard to go to sleep with that. Finally, when Alit couldn't curl up any more, the next time the thunder sounded, he jumped out of his sleeping bag and grabbed the thing closest to him, screaming "Hug me, Teddy!"

Imagine his surprise when he saw that that _thing_ was Misael.

A very tired, now fuming, Misael.

Alit quickly jumped off of Misael, the latter having a very angry aura encircling him.

"What were you doing, Alit?" Misael asked. The question sent Alit under his sleeping bag, trembling.

Now this whole ruckus had woken up every Barian in the room. Thus, every Barian had witnessed what just transpired, especially Durbe. He was also the only Barian willing to step in, probably because he was the only one capable of calming Misael down when he was mad.

"Misael, calm down," Durbe said. "You're not helping Alit's fears even a little." He sighed. "But when I think about it, what can we do? We can't exactly cure Alit in an hour."

"I've got an idea!" Vector chimed in. "You know how people can overcome their fears by facing them?"

"Yes," Durbe tentatively replied, not liking where this was going.

"Well, I was thinking we could do the same thing here." Vector stepped on Gilag, and pointed to the sky. "Send him up to the thunder!"

At the same time, the thunder sounded in the sky, as if agreeing to Vector's claim.

Durbe shook his head. "I'm afraid that won't work, Vector," he said. "Thunder is just hot air hitting each other. We can't use that on Alit."

The glow around Vector quickly vanished, but in a couple of seconds, that light was back, obviously with a new idea.

"How about ghost stories? If Alit can't stand hearing the thunder, why don't we divert his attention elsewhere?" he suggested.

Durbe stayed silent. Then he sighed. "Well, it's better than having Alit jumping on Misael. Very well."

Vector jumped up in the air, using Gilag as a jumping pad. "YATTA!" he yelled. Durbe sighed.

This was a very, very, bad idea.

* * *

Vector rubbed his hands together, greatly excited about the ghost stories. "All right," he said, "Miza-chan, why don't you start first?"

Misael growled. "First off, don't ever call me that. Second, I don't know any ghost stories. This is actually the first I've heard of them."

Vector got a glum look. "Oh," he turned to Durbe. "What about you? You read a lot of books."

Durbe shook his head. "Actually, the books I read are more of Fantasy than Horror. So I'm afraid I don't know any."

The glum was replaced with gloom, a faint purple aura floating around Vector. "Okay," he replied. He turned to Gilag. "You?"

Gilag became flustered. "Um, remember the time I fell into the Sea of Ill Intent? The shock was so great, I forgot all my ghost stories."

The gloom became heavier. "You made that up," Vector whined. He then turned to Alit. "Alit?"

Alit sat up straight, his eyes wide with surprise. "Don't look at me. You guys started doing this to calm me down."

Vector stared at Alit.

And stared.

And stared.

And stared.

Then finally, he jumped up, throwing his arm in the air. "All right! If you guys aren't gonna do any ghost stories, I WILL!"

He sat down, crossed his arms, and thought.

For a while.

Just when the Barians were getting used to the silence, Vector piped up with a story.

"I've got it! Everyone, gather round, for Vector is in the building!" he yelled.

"Yeah, that's what I'm afraid of," Misael mumbled.

"Huh? What was that?" Vector asked.

"Nothing," Misael said.

Vector, for once, didn't pursue the matter. He sat down, crossed his legs, and began. "Alright, everyone, listen, because I'm gonna show you what ghost stories are all about."

Everyone backed away as Vector smirked evilly.

* * *

"Once upon a time," Vector began, "a very long time ago-"

"'Once upon a time, a very long time ago?'" Misael cut in. "Where did you learn your ghost stories?"

"Just shut it!" Vector snapped. "This is my ghost story, so I can tell it however I want to."

"Fine." Misael crossed his arms and leaned back onto his now rolled up sleeping bag.

"Now as I was saying before being so _rudely_ interrupted, once upon a time, a very long time ago, there was a Baker and a Butcher. They were very good friends, and in times of need, they would help each other. Well, one sunny day, the Butcher was cutting a dead animal up when he hit a rock it swallowed. Because of this, his knife split in two." Vector paused to see if everyone was listening. When his needs were satisfied, he continued.

"This was the only knife he owned in the world, so he went to his friend, the Baker, who gladly lent him one of his knives. And that night, when the Butcher was doing his work, he brought the knife fiercely down. However, to his surprise, the knife came off the handle and flew into his chest." Alit whimpered and cuddled with his real teddy, which he made sure to get before Vector started. Grinning, Vector went on.

"And so the Butcher lay there, the Baker's knife in his chest. At the end of his life, the Butcher swore revenge against the Baker for giving him that faulty knife. He was found the next morning dead, by his own friend, the Baker. The funeral was held soon after that. Then, three days later, when the Baker was closing up for the night, he turned to find the Butcher's old knife, completely fixed. Floating in the air. The Baker didn't have any time to think before the blade thrust itself forward, straight into the Baker's heart. Just like the way the Butcher died. And then, the moment the Baker died, a maniacal laughter sounded through the air. The Butcher's revenge was complete. But despite the fulfillment of his revenge, he cannot leave the knife. To this day, he has been waiting for his next victim to come along. And so he has been wandering the earth, eventually being called," Vector paused for the suspense; "the Butcher's Revenge!" he yelled, raising his hand in the air.

Alit screamed and ducked under his sleeping bag, cuddling his teddy all the while. Durbe got up and clapped his hands.

"Okay," he said, "ghost stories are over. Let's all get to bed now. It's late enough."

Everyone agreed, and soon, everyone was asleep.

But the terrors were not over yet.

* * *

Commercial Break

* * *

It was the middle of the night. All the Barians were sleeping soundly, and the candles had finally burned out. The storm had died down a bit, though the power was still out. It was during this time of the night that a single Barian rose from his sleeping bag to leave the room. He slowly walked towards the door, opened it, and left.

Scarcely one minute later, a long, terrifying scream rang throughout the BARian, instilling terror into every soul that heard it.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHH! IT'S TRYING TO KILL ME! HELP ME!"

Every Barian was sent into freakout mode, Durbe being the first to make it out of his sleeping bag and to the door. He opened the door, and I daresay he was as scared as the Barian in the hall.

More precisely, Alit.

Against the wall, with a knife a millimeter away from the side of his head.

A butcher knife.

"Alit!" Gilag said, running over to him. "Are you okay?"

Alit turned towards his buddy. "I-i'm o-oka-y." he stammered. "Ju-just a l-little sc-scared."

"I should say you're scared." Durbe said, pulling the knife from the wall. "It's amazing the knife didn't hit you. What happened? Speak slowly."

Alit gulped. "I was going to the bathroom," he said, "and when I opened the door, this knife jumped out at me. I hardly had any time to react."

"What's this?" Misael asked. He was holding a folded piece of paper in his hand.

"Where did you find it?" Durbe asked.

"On the floor, below the knife." Misael responded. He then proceeded to open it up. His eyes then widened at the words inside.

"W-what is it?" Alit stammered.

Misael took his eyes off the paper and handed it to Durbe. "Here."

Durbe took it and opened it himself, with Alit reading over his shoulder.

_The Gladiator falls with a blade to the head._

Durbe's eyes widened at the message. He turned to Alit frantically. "Alit-"

Too late.

The Battlin' Boxer duelist had just run back into the room.

They rushed in, Gilag being first, and found Alit rolling up his sleeping bag and stuffing his teddy in it.

"Alit!" Gilag said. "What are you doing?"

"What does it look like I'm doing?!" Alit replied, a terrified look on his face. "I'm packin' up. Don't you see?! I've been marked with the Butcher's Revenge! I've gotta get out of the country, find some rock to hide under!" He got up, threw his sleeping bag over his shoulder, and hugged Gilag. "You've all been great friends, but I'm afraid it's time to go." He turned to Durbe and was about to hug him, but Durbe grabbed Alit's shoulders to keep him in place.

"Alit," he said. "Pull yourself together. You can't possibly be marked with the Butcher's Revenge."

"Why not?" Alit asked.

"Because," Durbe answered, "we haven't done anything to him. He has no reason to want revenge against us."

"Actually," Vector said, "he does have a reason."

All the Emperors turned to face Vector. The Barian had a regretful look on his face, as if he'd done something very, very bad. The others almost didn't want to know.

"What is it?" Durbe asked.

Vector hesitated. Then he solemnly looked at the floor.

"I... used the Butcher's Revenge to cut vegetables."

Everyone just stared at Vector. Then Alit spoke up, pulling his arms away from Durbe, releasing himself from his grip.

"But how does that effect me? Why is he after me if you used him?"

Vector looked at Alit as if he had gone insane. "Are you daft?" he asked. "You all ate the vegetables."

That did it.

Alit picked up his sleeping bag and tried to leave the room again. Much faster than before.

Fortunately, Durbe was also much faster than before. He lunged forward, taking hold of Alit's wrist, just barely managing to keep him in the room.

"Alit," he said. "Calm dow-" Durbe stopped when his ears caught a sound.

A _click _sound. And when Durbe turned his head towards the source, he found himself face to face with a knife.

* * *

Durbe jumped to the side, narrowly avoiding the tip of the knife. It whizzed past him, lodging itself in the wall, shaking back and forth because of the speed that it was thrown.

"Durbe!" Alit exclaimed. "Are you okay?!"

Not answering, and slightly trembling, Durbe walked over to the knife and dislodged it. Just as he thought. The handle of the knife had a piece of paper tied to it, exactly like the one that they found near Alit. Slowly, he unfolded it. On it was a single word.

_Knightfall._

Okay. Kinda creepy.

Misael walked up to Durbe and read the message in his hands. "Nightfall?" he asked. "Why is it spelled like that?"

Durbe looked closer at the note. "I don't know," he answered.

"Isn't it obvious?" Vector asked. "You were a knight in your past life. If that knife hit you..." He didn't need to finish his sentence.

Durbe turned to everyone. "All right everybody!" he said. "We can't leave here, because the storm is still bad. Lets all just stay here, stay together, and above all, do not leave this room."

All of the Barians nodded. Well, all except Misael.

"Please," he said. "We start to get attacked by the Butcher right after Vector finishes a story about him? Nonsense." He turned and walked to the door, grabbed the knob, and opened it.

Now I don't need to tell you what happened next.

The few strands of Misael's hair hadn't even touched the floor when the door was closed. Cautiously and slowly, Misael stepped backwards, with his hands held up.

"Misael, are you all right?" Alit asked.

Misael stiffly turned his head to face Alit. "I'm fine," he said, with a hint of terror in his voice. "What made you think I wasn't?"

"I'll tell you why," Vector said. "Because you were just an inch away from getting your head cut off."

Misael stared at Vector. Then Gilag said something that caught his attention.

"Guys! I found the note! It must have fallen off the knife!"

Misael rushed over to Gilag, grabbed the note from his hands, and read it.

_Dragon Tamer is on the menu._

Only Durbe had time to read it before the _Dragon Tamer _crushed it in his hands.

"What is this supposed to be?" he growled. "If this is a joke, it isn't funny."

"I don't think this is a joke, Misael," someone cut in.

Everyone turned to find Vector holding a knife.

The same one that nearly hit everyone else.

"YOU!" Misael yelled. "You've been doing this!"

Vector stepped back defensively. "Hey!" he said. "I found this knife in front of the door, the one that nearly hit you! What I was trying to say was..."

He paused.

"Well?" Misael asked.

One thing you could always say about Vector is that he was stubborn. And that was exactly what you could call him now. "Well, maybe I won't say anything," he said. "Unless," he trailed off.

"What?" Misael asked. He wasn't very happy right now, narrowly avoiding a knife and all. Vector smirked.

"I'll tell you on one condition."

"Which is?" Misael was getting more irked by the minute.

Vector's smirk got bigger. "You have to tell me you're sorry."

That **really **got to Misael. If Gilag hadn't grabbed him, he would've done something 'unpleasant'.

Vector walked over to the helpless Misael. "Come on," he prompted. "Just two little words. Don't you want to know what I have to say?"

It took several minutes of prompting, kicking, and held back anger before Misael swallowed his dragon pride and said those two words.

"I'm sorry!" Misael spat. "Now hold up your end of the bargain. Tell us."

"I just wanted to tell you," Vector began, "all the other knives are gone."

* * *

Everyone had decided to go to sleep, forget about the incidents for at least three hours. One hour into their three hour plan, _another _Barian rose from his bed. And it wasn't to go to the bathroom.

The figure slowly walked over the other sleeping Emperors, being as quiet as possible until he reached the door. He reached for the knob, slowly turned it, and opened the door. He walked forward, out of the room, slowly closing the door with his outstretched arm. The figure walked up the hall, carefully examining the entirety of the hall in front of him.

He should have looked behind.

A green eye flashed, and a darkened hand reached for the figure's shoulder.

Contact had an unexpected outcome.

The figure screamed, whipped around, and hit the other one on the head.

* * *

Alit sat in the candlelit hall, both of his hands on his head. "You hit me," he wailed.

Durbe hid the dented candlestick holder behind his back. "Gomen, Alit," he said. "You startled me."

Alit stood up. "Startled you?! You hit me on the head!" He reached behind Durbe's back, grabbing the candlestick holder. "With this!" Durbe winced. "What were you even doing out here, anyway?"

"Well," Durbe said, looking over to the holes in the wall, "I just wanted to figure out who threw those knives. And I reacted when you touched my shoulder."

"It's okay," Alit sniffed. "You thought I was the Butcher."

"No, I didn't," Durbe said simply. "And I don't think that these knives were the work of a butcher. They were too precise."

"Of course they were precise!" Alit shouted, grabbing hold of Durbe's body. "It's because the Butcher is haunting us!"

"Don't be ridiculous, Alit," Durbe said, shoving Alit off of him. "The only way someone would have been able to throw these was if they knew where we were going to be walking. And a dead man can't see."

"Then...that means," Alit choked out.

Durbe's face lit up. Maybe Alit was getting it.

"THE BUTCHER'S ALIVE!?"

Or not.

"ALIT!" Durbe snapped. "That is quite enough! Pull yourself together!"

Alit sniffed. "I'll try." His face lit up. "Hey! Can I help you find the Butcher's accomplice?"

Durbe sighed. "Sure, Alit," he replied sarcastically. "Lets go."

Alit nodded. "Great! Where do we go first?"

Durbe pointed to the bathroom. "That's where the first attack was, so we'll start there." Alit nodded again.

Together, the two Barians walked into the bathroom, Alit holding a candlestick stand as a weapon. Durbe laid his hand on the door, it's slow creaking adding to the terror. When the door was fully open, it revealed something shocking to both of the Barian Emperors.

"No way!" Durbe exclaimed.

"How did I dodge that?!" Alit yelled.

A crossbow. Right in front of the door.

As if someone planted it there.

The two Barians started to examine the room, Durbe going straight for the crossbow. Durbe fingered the string as he examined it.

Shot. No doubt about it. This is what sent the knife at Alit. But how did it get set off? Moreover-

_'How did this lunatic load the knife on here?' _Durbe thought.

"Hey, what's this?" Alit wondered.

"Huh?" Durbe turned to Alit. The Barian was holding a string, connected to the crossbow.

That went into a hole bored in the wall.

And since the bathroom was next to the bedroom...

Instantly, Durbe stood up and raced out of the bathroom, Alit not far behind.

"Hey, Durbe!" he said. "Where are you going?"

Durbe stopped in front of the door to the bedroom, and, opening it, looked frantically around the room.

Then a dark, evil voice rang throughout the room.

_**"**__**I see you've found out my secret. No matter. You're too late!"**_

Durbe heard another clicking sound. Looking up, he saw a knife falling.

Straight for Gilag's hulking form.

"Nooooo!" Alit yelled, running up to Gilag and jumping in the air, barely managing to kick the knife out of the way.

Due to the second ruckus that night, Gilag and Misael had woken up again. One of them not so happy about being woken up before the three hour limit.

That one being Misael.

"What's going on now?!" Misael demanded.

"Has the Butcher struck again?" Gilag asked.

"You could say that." Durbe replied. "Alit, Misael, do me a favor and search the opposite sides of the room from where the first knives hit."

The two did as they were told, though Misael was grumbling about something unintelligible. The two found themselves searching the shelves on the walls, with each revealing something very familiar.

Two more crossbows.

And, like the last one, they had strings attached.

Durbe smiled. He told Misael and Alit to follow their strings to the other end, then he went to the third wall, grabbed the string on the other end of the hole in the bathroom, and all three of them followed the strings to a single point.

Guess what that single point was? Go on, guess. No? All right.

Vector's sleeping bag.

Misael tapped on the bag, the anger marks visible on his face.

"Vector." Misael said, in a **very** threatening tone.

The Barian threw the sleeping bag away from his head, sat up, and smiled gleefully at them all. "_**Hello, everyone,**_" he said. Vector held a phone connected to a voice changer in his hand. Next to him laid a second phone, that one being put on speaker. _**"What's up?"**_

"I'll tell you what's up," Misael growled, raising his clenched hand. "My fist. You want it to come down?"

"No thank you," Vector said, putting down the phone. "I'd like to keep my face."

Alit gasped, dropping his string as he did so. "Are you telling me...?" he said. "That Vector set up those knives?!"

Durbe sighed in disappointment. "Yes, Alit. Vec-"

Alit started jumping in the air, raising his fist up high. "YEEEEEEEES!" he yelled. "THE BUTCHER ISN'T REAL!"

Durbe and Misael fell anime style.

"That's what I was trying to tell everybody this whole time, but no one would listen." Misael grumbled, standing back up.

Vector started bursting with laughter. All the Barians turned to him. "What is it?" Misael snapped.

Vector spoke between his breaths. "Oh, nothing." he said. "It's just so funny. It took you this long to realize the trick I was pulling."

"Explain." Misael demanded.

"Okay, I confess. I set up the crossbows, bored the hole in the wall, and set up the knives to kill you. Trust me, you would not _believe_ how hard it was to set those up. I spent hours in my room trying to figure it out."

'_I thought Barian World was more quiet than usual' _Durbe thought.

"But honestly, the thing I'm most surprised about is that you still haven't gotten my message."

Durbe's head snapped down. "What message?" he asked.

Vector started to get out of his sleeping bag, standing up in the middle of the four Barians. (If you include Gilag.)He put his hands in his pockets and looked at Durbe, smirking all the while.

"Put all the notes together and hold them up to the light," Vector said. "Then it should make sense."

Durbe walked over to the knife, dislodged it from the ground, and took off the note that was tied to it.

_Roasted Tanuki._

Casting that unwelcome message aside, Durbe examined the rest of the paper. On the corner, written in light pencil, were two letters.

_RS_

Durbe, upon seeing this, gathered all the other notes and looked at them.

Alit's: _S_

Durbe's: _UC_

Misael's: _KE_

Durbe, as instructed, laid them all on each other. Slowly, he said the message out loud.

"Suckers?" he wondered.

Guess who's ears caught that.

Misael's.

Who immediately turned to the soon to be dead Emperor, the latter having gotten a head start near the door.

Ever chased someone, and slowed down so that they could get ahead of you?

"Get back here, you lunatic!"

"No thanks, my life is precious!"

"Maybe I should put you on the roof with the lightning!"

"Too late, it already stopped!"

Not so here.

Durbe sighed and opened a portal, beckoning the last two Emperors to follow.

"We'll let them fight it out." Durbe said simply.

The three then jumped into the network. Forget trying to stop them. Durbe was going to have a nice long rest.

* * *

**FairyLyte: Yeah, my sister and I came up with this fic during the dishes. I was drying a knife and remembered an accident I had with them. Then my sis joked about a living butcher knife, and voila! This fic was born! Hope you all like it as much as we did. Review!**


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